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Wednesday, 7 September 2011

Oh Bugger, I've lost an earring

I was surprised when I heard those words.  I know I shouldn't have been, but I was.
It was all wrong somehow.

I grew up in the 1950s, and I've seen great changes since then.

I can remember seeing steam lorries on the roads.
I can remember wearing blue gabardine raincoats, just like every other male, except those that wore grey gabardine raincoats.  And a hat.
I can remember the first TV in our street.
I can remember when colour TV started.
I can remember buying biscuits from a box, and taking them home in a brown paper bag.
I can remember being taught to always:
  • Stand up when a visitor came into the room
  • Give up my seat in a bus or train to my elders and all ladies
  • Do whatever any adult told you to do
  • Say thank you to anyone who did anything for me
  • Call adults Sir or Ma'am
  • Respect Teachers and the Police
  • Suspect anyone with a Tattoo to be either a criminal, a deviant or a sailor.

But times have changed greatly.  If you've lived through the changes, then the differences were developing so gradually that they were barely noticeable, but looked at from the distance of 50 years, the changes were huge and shocking.

I mention all this because the words of the title were spoken by my son.

I would never have dreamed of hearing something like that from another bloke when I was a lad.

The only men who wore earrings were Gypsies and the occasional sailor.

Hello Sailor!

It just didn't happen.

I love him dearly, and I thought I'd become inured to  the changes in today's youth, but I still felt surprise when he started searching the floor last night on his hands and knees, telling us his earring had dropped out.

He dresses like a Goth who's been frightened by a rag-and-bone man.  He buys T shirts that cost more than my Scottish Harris Tweed Sports Jacket, and that look like a dishrag after two or three washes.  His jeans (skintight) quickly develop holes in the knees and crotch, and he pays a bloody fortune for them as well.  I just can't understand it.  I'm still wearing a pair of corduroy trousers I bought over 7 years ago for a very reasonable sum from a M & S sale, he's lucky to get 6 months out of his $300 designer jeans.


And Why Oh Why does he and most of his generation like to display their chosen underwear to all and sundry.  I think that's the reason for the crotch holes appearing.  He wears his bloody jeans so far down his arse that the crotch area rubs against his knees, causing the friction, stress and subsequent holes. 


What on Earth has happened to our pleasant society made up of pleasant, polite, neatly dressed people with neat haircuts?

I do believe I'm turning into an old grouch.

Pull those bloody trousers up....or else...

And I'm very happy about it.

 Mind you, there have ben some other major improvements since the 1950s.
Like the bikini.

And tight jeans aren't ALL bad.


  1. "I can remember wearing blue gabardine raincoats, just like every other male,"

    Wow! What a flashback. I remember when everyone at school came tightly belted up in these on wet winter days. Is it a result of global warming that we don't see them anymore or that mothers drive their precious cargo to the door of schools now.

  2. Dear Twisted, I think jeans worn halfway down one's arse look sad and frankly ridiculous. However, I am hopeful that this fashion will disappear. Sadly, we all grow old and conservative. When your son has to front up to Parent and Teacher's night when your grandchildren are in High School something tells me that he will be wearing trousers held up with a belt, no undies or holes in sight. I think the ear ring will be long gone. Glad to see that you are still taking an interest in life, Twisted. Just expect a clip around the ears from Mrs Twisted if you look too long! Lindaxxx

  3. TSB you could always join the club and give your son and Ringo a run for their money.
    I reckon you would look very distinguished with a flashy gold earring. Why not even go for a diamond or two?

  4. TC: I think they went out of fashion not because they were unstylish (even though they were)but because they had the property of soaking up water at a great rate, so you ended up even wetter for longer.

    Linda from Chile: Thanks for the reassurance. I'm pretty sure the arse-exposing jeans will fade away, but I'm not too sure about the earring. Mrs. Twisted gives me a loving belt round the ear every day, just in case.

    Valley Girl: What a horrible thought. The same club as Ringo? Never. Mind you, I've often thought that a couple of scalps from the inglorious Year 10s hanging from my belt would be more in line with my type of fashion statement.

  5. The new fashion menace stalking England at the moment is thin tights worn by women as trousers. The female rear, as you have demonstrated in that lovely photo, is a beatuful thing to have and to hold. But not in skin-tight lycra.

  6. looby: I think it should be a capital offence to seel these bloody tights to any woman over 50. Or over 150kg except perhpas Iman or Kathleen Turner or just maybe Bridget Fonda. My beloved sometimes wears them, but ALWAYS under a skirt or a very long top.

  7. The one in tight jeans are hot

  8. Anonymous: Tight jeans are always hot. Unless the waist size is bigger than the wearer's IQ.


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